I went to a holiday party this weekend at a private home in Rancho Sante Fe, Ca.  The gracious host was directing everyone to her laundry room to store their coats.  I just had to snap a picture to share with all of you (with her permission of course and a little help from my friend, Vana White Monica Lucas, Owner of SpaMode who was dressed in white and looking like a snow princess ). 

Maybe some of your laundry rooms look just like this one but mine doesn’t.  Six Figure Moms, can you just imagine how much quicker you could finish up your laundry to do list if you had a combination washer/dryer for each color load?  Well, this lucky household had just that plus a beautufil travertine top folding counter!  I think I could make a lot of progress on my work-life balance with a laundry room like this since you have to be able to finish up in a fraction of the time!

So print this out and add this to your vision board/treasure maps for 2009.  This seems like a must have for every working mother!  Heck, I didn’t even know they made machines that both washed and dried.  Super awesome!  Speaking of vision boards, Six Figure Moms Club-San Diego will be meeting on January 22 for a super goal setting event.  Stay tuned for detail but pencil it in your calenders. Until then, happy laundry!

I don’t watch much TV but yesterday I wanted to record Gary Vaynerchuk making his debut appearance on the Today show.  I love Gary.  I’ve been hooked since I first heard him speak last September.  I didn’t know who he was but once I heard him speak, I was addicted.  After his talk ended, I asked for his advice about a Six Figure Moms Club membership site.  I wanted the site to be free versus paid and he agreed.  I had been coached by many that it had to be a paid membership site.  That just didn’t feel right to me.  I wanted the site to be availabe to everyone and I thought charging a fee would inhibit people from joining.  Gary agreed.  (The membership site launches in early January.  I’m so excited and I hope you’ll check it out and join!)

Gary is amazingly motivating when you hear him speak.  He’s CRAZY when he talks but so real that I can’t help but feel connected to him.  He does live Ustream shows from his office which are great too.  They are often impromptu.  He’ll announce them and within 5 minutes, 600 people have shown up to watch.  Gary has made a name for himself for being authentic, truthful and doing what he loves.  His family owns a wine company but Gary himself produces an internet wine show at www.winelibrary.tv.  He also speaks, offers corporate coaching and is known as a social media and personal branding expert.

Additionally, Gary talks about something near to my heart, people who want to change their careers and follow their passions. Gary preaches that if you are unhappy in your current job, there’s nobody to blame but yourself.  I’ve heard him talk about how a person can still work their day job, spend a few hours with their family and then spend the hours of 9pm to 2am working on a plan to reengineer their lives and careers.  He says you have nobody to blame but yourself if you are unhappy.  It’s a hardnosed approach but he’s right.  Some of you may know that I’ve written a book, QUITTING IS EVERYTHING!  It’s sitting nicely here on my shelf waiting for its publishing partner.  It’s a series of interviews with six figure earners who left their corporate jobs for more fulfilling passionate work and a how to guide about career transition and working in a job you love.  I hope to publish my book someday.  In the meantime, try to catch Gary talking about career change but be warned, you will be motivated to change.

Also, I’m sure Gary will have his Today show segment up on his site in a few days if you’re interested in seeing his spot.  He recommends some fabulous champagnes and proseccos for under $20.  In Gary’s signature language, make sure to give them all a good “sniffy-sniff”.  “American’s just don’t smell their alcohols enough” and that makes Gary very sad ;-(.

So, what do I have in common with Matt? Well, likey a couple of things related to travel in Italy but the main thing is….Today Show Co-Host, Matt Lauer, attended Ohio University, my alma mater.  He just has to be a good guy   Afterall, it is known as being ranked consistently in the top 20 of all party school lists!  (And they do have a top ranked journalism school too!)

Have a great day everyone and CONGRATULATIONS @GARYVEE!

If you’ve been following along, you know that my love affair with Twitter has been going on for a few months now. This past weekend, I had the great pleasure of meeting the author of The Twitter Revolution, Warren Whitlock…again. Not only did I meet Warren but I also had the honor of joining him at TwitCastRadio when he interviewed Adaptive Blue about Glue, a cool new tool that enhances your web browsing experience.  Can you imagine what I asked when it came to my turn for an interview question?  Of course, you’re right!  I asked how the new tool could interface with twitter!  You’ll also hear Mari Smith stepping in for a few seconds too.  (You can hear our interview by clicking on the links above.)

I so enjoyed spending time with Warren this weekend and I could write this whole post about him.  However, that’s not what’s important for you.  Here is what I want you working mothers to hear about my experience and to put to use for reengineering your own lives if it’s helpful for you:

There are successful (and sometimes famous) people around waiting to help you with whatever you need and they are within your grasp.  All you need to do is reach out to them.

Coaches, editors and publishers have been advising me that famous people are much more within our grasp than we think and that they are much more willing to help you than you would imagine.  It’s not a natural thing for us to pick up the phone and call someone like Oprah, but hey, who knows? I just might someday soon and you should too.

When I left for this conference, I jokingly said to my husband, “Warren Whitlock is broadcasting his radio show live from the hotel and I’m going to join him”.  My husband laughed and said, “OK, Angie” with a skeptic tone.  I did know that Warren was broadcasting his show because I had invited him to dinner and I knew he had a time conflict.  I didn’t, however, expect to be interviewing his guest along side him.  Like just about everyone else that I’ve met in the social media space.  I found Warren delightful, open and so willing to reach out a helping hand (Oh, and very funny too).  Thank you Warren!

And by the way, thanks to @sugarjones for taking this great picture below of Warren and I and uploading it to Twitpics just before the interview started.  Don’t we look like a great broadcast journalist team?

Tracy Green just launched a new website, www.smartworkingmom.com.  Her site is worth a look if you have a minute.  This week, she emailed me and also left a comment on my blog.  I’d like to share them both with you because I think you’ll relate to what she’s saying.

 Email:  “I applaude you!  It was so refreshing to see a website that makes it okay for moms to work, and want to work and celebrates those who do!  I’m emailing to ask your permission to list www.sixfiguremomsclub.com as a  HOT LINK on my evolving website:  www.smartworkingmom.com.  I’m a full-time, plus working mom of two boys and enjoy having a career. My issue became that I was in complete control and successful at the office, but at home — forget it! I was out of my element.  (Snipped)

 Blog Comment: ”First, this is such a dynamic site! Finally, a site that doesn’t try to help moms get over whatever “guilt” they have for working. In terms of the one thing that I’m grateful for this Thanksgiving, OPPORTUNITY — the opportunity to have it all, career, family, health, success, etc. Best, Tracy”

Tracy points out three major issues for Six Figure Working Moms:  Judgment, Guilt and the ability to successfully juggle everything.  In her email, Tracy says it’s refreshing that my website makes it okay for mom’s to work.  Absolutely!  In my mind, it’s okay for a mom to do whatever she wants as long as she’s making choices that are healthy for herself and her family.  It’s so hard for us to remember not to judge each other isn’t it?  We women are our worst enemies.  I catch myself judging other women’s choices all the time and having to remind myself that it’s really none of my business.  Try it for one week.   Be on ultra alert for when you are judging others and ask yourself why.

The second issue Tracy points out is Guilt.  Why DO we feel guilty about working and wanting things for ourselves?  It doesn’t really matter why because it’s a phenomenon that’s been around for as long as women have been working and it’s not likely going away.  I say this because acknowledging guilt as a normal part of being a working mother sometimes makes it a bit more palatable.  Sure, there are some days when it bothers us more than others.  For me, those are the days when I need to readjust my calendar, reroute my priorities and spend more time with my daughter.  My guilt is a pretty good barometer if I use it and understand it correctly. 

Lastly, Tracy discusses that she had everything perfectly oiled at work but things were falling apart at home.  Sound familiar?  There really are only so many hours in the day and you’ve got to remember that balance is required when you’re living your life in the fast lane of career and home life.  You have to allow room for error when your operating at this fast pace.  If someone gets sick or something unexpected happens, your plan will get off kilter so plan for that as a normal part of your routine.  It will undoubtedly happen.  If you expect it, it won’t be such a surprise and will be a little easier to deal with.

“If you only get to give one answer, what ONE thing are you most grateful for?” 

My answer is STRUGGLE.  I’m so thankful for the struggle I have in my life and for so many reasons.

• Struggle makes me continue to grow and think about things from a multitude of perspectives.
• Struggle reminds me that I’m alive.
• Struggle highlights that if things are always easy that I’m not stepping up enough and that I’ve become complacent.  That’s not who I am.  I should be struggling with something.  I’m a change agent and that means that there should be struggle in my life…in every aspect.  That means there will be struggle in my relationships, my career, inside me.
• Struggle is my friend and my ally. If I forget that and let it make me feel down, then that is a sign that I’m not taking good care of myself.
• Struggle is my daughter’s friend too.  She is a lot like her mother.  I must remember who she is and how she is wired and remember that she will struggle with me and that it’s not personal.  It is her path too.

So, yes, my answer my seem a bit strange to you and that’s okay with me.  I want you to think about YOU at your CORE.  What are you truly grateful for about YOU?

YES, I’m grateful for so many other things too.  My daughter, my husband, my family, my friends, my strength, my health, my good fortune, my business, flexible work, work life balance, social media, all the inspiring entrepreneurs I’ve met, and the list goes on and on.  I’m a very, very lucky girl and with a friend like struggle, it’s important for me to stop, sit and remember all these things on a regular basis.

And lastly, let us not forget the comedic one:  TWITTER.  I’m thankful for my affair with twitter.  Yes, it’s still on and it’s hot and heavy.  I’m still in love with twitter and our relationship continues to blossom.

I wish you a very Happy Thanksgiving.  I hope you will take a few moments and reflect upon your own struggles, how purposeful they are for you and the wonderful treasures they bring to you in the end.  Be well. Be safe.

If for some reason, you happen to spending this Thanksgiving season alone or in a sad spot or if you are outside of the United States, visit my friend Gail Goodwin’s site at Inspire Me Today.  She’s always got something uplifting to say  

(P.S. Gail is about to make a huge global annoucement about an initiative we’re working on together. Stay tuned and SHHHHH until then.)

I love cooking a huge Thanksgiving dinner and having a large group at my house. The more the merrier. In my opionion, the key to avoiding overwhelm is all in the planning. Yes, at Thanksgiving and in life. It’s just like any other large project you need to manage. Look at your goal and then plan backward from the deadline. Outline the critical path activities and go from there. How am I doing? Am I taking all the fun and sexiness out of your Thanksgiving day experience? Maybe it sounds that way but for me, I’ve found that proper planning is the key to my enjoyment factor. If I am able to take the guess work out of my Thanksgiving cooking schedule (and my life scheduling), then I can spend my time enjoying the process and the day.

Here’s my tip for what you should do this week with your Thanksgiving planning:

Monday

• Plan Food Menu
• Plan Beverage Menu
• Plan Thursday Morning Breakfast and Snack Schedule (Avoid Hungry Grumpies within your Tribe)
• Gather all Recipes
• Do all shopping in advance (Hopefully, some of you did this last week to avoid crowds)
• Assemble Serving Dishes, Glasses, Plates and Table Necessities (Silverware, Centerpieces, Candles, etc)
• Make Assignments for your spouse (align these with his/her talents and affinities)
• Make spouse feel like it takes someone with the skills of a King, Queen or Knight to accomplish the task you are asking them to help with
• Make sure you have your favorite Tea, Coffee, Wine or Cocktail on Hand and Imbibe freely (but wisely) during your cooking fun this week

Tuesday

• Prechop everything you can (Onions, Celery, Carrots, Breads)
• Planned and Prepare Kids Foods (As Possible e.g. precook pasta, etc)
• Cookand bake in advance (Cranberry sauce, boil sweet potatoes, moir poix, pies, cakes, jello molds, relishes)
• Put time in your day for something relaxing (meditation, bath, 10 minutes of reading your favorite book or magazing, a quiet walk down your street to get your barrings). This is huge in the success of keeping your sanity and keeping you on track this week.

Wednesday

• I prefer Fresh Turkeys BUT….
• If your bird is Frozen, make sure you thaw the bird if it’s frozen. IT TAKES A LONG TIME.
• Put everything in dishes that you can (relishes, condiments, pickles, jellies, salt, pepper, etc)
• Continue advance prep for recipes
• Select table linens
• Set the table
• More time for you to relax
• Do something fun with your family.
• Buy fresh flowers (or best, ask hubby to….)
• Revisit your lists. Evaluate whether a trip to the store is necessary.

Thursday

• I’m a member of the Cook the Turkey in a Turkey Bag Crowd. It’s easy and awesome and the bird is juicy and full proof.
• Cook the bird according to the Birds directions.
• Ready beverages
• Finish cooking what must be done today
• ENJOY!

Ok, so what about those of you who have no idea where to even start?  My advice is to go to a site like http://allrecipes.com/ which has easy to follow recipes and avoid some of the more mature sites like http://www.epicurious.com/ and http://www.foodnetwork.com/.  Although, these sites are among my top favorites, they can be intimidating for beginners.  Other great sites like http://www.kraftfoods.com/kf/Pages/home.aspx have great recipes for beginners too.  Good luck!

So, in closing, why do I think Avoiding Overwhelm at Thanksgiving is just like avoiding it in life?  Here you go:

• You have take care of yourself first to avoid overwhelm
• You have to plan, plan, plan
• You have to expect that something is going to go wrong and that’s just part of both.  No big deal.  Readjust, move forward and enjoy the adventure.
• Someone WILL say something you don’t like and someone will make someone else uncomfortable.  You’ll have to help, you won’t want to but it’s all part of your journey.

• I don’t publish pictures of my daughter on the internet….period. Not anywhere.
• Since this has not always been my policy so I ask friends and family to alert me if they come upon a picture that I’m not aware of so that I can promptly remove it.
• I don’t use my daughter’s given name when writing about her and my family. I’m sure there are people I meet in the public who ask her name and I answer. However, with regard to the internet, I don’t publish her name.
• I advise my friends not to publish their children’s pictures or names on the internet.
• I realize there are times when I may be in the public eye and events covered by the media may include pictures of me and my daughter. I will limit my daughter’s exposure when I can but realize this is inevitable.

You might be thinking, “But Angie, you of all people are a Social Media Evangelist who is having an affair with Twitter, How can you be so against using one of it’s best features to share joy with loved ones and friends?”. My answer to your question is a simple one. There’s no possible way that I can conceive of the same thoughts that a child killer/abuser can. I don’t think it’s possible for me to rationally assess the situation because that would require me, being able to stand in the shoes of the exact person that is a threat to my child. It’s just not possible. Thus, I am unprotected, because I live in a world of false security. I do believe there are wackos out there living in society ready to snap at any minute. I can’t protect myself or my family from them 100% but I can take the proper precautions and these are some of them, why wouldn’t I?

If you need more convincing, just read this article about how the US Army is worried that terrorists might use Twitter as a competitve war advantage.

I was working on another project this morning at my kitchen table with the window open.  It’s a typical Santa Ana fall weekend in San Diego where it feels like the threat of fires.  When you’ve lived here through both the Cedar and the Witch Creek fires, your sensors are up for that kind of stuff in the fall.  Both of those fires came within a mile of my home.  Luckily, we survived with minor damage and big messes from both.  Comparitively speaking, over 400 homes in my community were lost last year.  It was a devastating time.

As you may have heard on the news, fires are raging in Santa Barbara and north of Los Angeles.  I’ve been consciously trying not to turn on the TV or Radio this morning to protect myself from the negative energy of the news.  This is often my process when I’m writing or working as I’m more productive.  However, I did pop onto to Twitter for a quick five minutes.

Within one minute, I knew that fire was threatening somewhere close the Santa Clarita valley (or so I thought).   I quickly thought of three twitter friends I had met in Ventura a few weeks ago:  @respres, @jesseluna and @lindaptaylor.  I sent them a tweet to come to San Diego if they felt at risk.  They responded within seconds that they were fine but another twitter freind @QueenofSpain was in more danger.  I don’t know @QueenofSpain but because she’s in their twitter tribe, she’s now in mine.  That’s how it works.  Their friends are my friends and so on.  Below is our twitter streams.  Start from the bottom and read up.

So, cross your fingers for @queenofspain and everyone else in the fire areas.

I wrote this post quickly to show you the enormous power of twitter.  It’s so incredibly useful in times like this and can give you news faster than any other source available to us.  Just think what it could do for your personal brand or your business.  Pretty incredible possibilities huh? 

Understand why I’m still having an affair with Twitter??

Tweets I typed or received:

QueenofSpain: @aaswartz thanks. will keep in mind. we can’t go south right now.

about 1 hour ago · Reply · View Tweet · Show ConversationHide Conversation

 

aaswartz: @QueenofSpain Girl, head south already!

about 1 hour ago · Reply · View Tweet · Show ConversationHide Conversation

 

aaswartz: @ResPres don’t know @queenofspain yet but bring her too. She’s ok if she knows U

about 1 hour ago · Reply · View Tweet · Show ConversationHide Conversation

 

aaswartz: @jesseluna We’ll grab @marismith and have a party and do some go away fire dance

about 1 hour ago · Reply · View Tweet · Show ConversationHide Conversation

 

aaswartz: @jesseluna Keep me posted and come if u need to.

about 1 hour ago · Reply · View Tweet · Show ConversationHide Conversation

 

ResPres: @aaswartz thank you. I don’t think we’re in danger, but the map I just looked at might make @queenofspain a bit nervous.

about 1 hour ago · Reply · View Tweet · Show ConversationHide Conversation

 

aaswartz: @respres @jesseluna @lindaptaylor Cedar fire was less than mile from my home. Saw fire coming from 3 directions when leaving. Said bye house

about 1 hour ago · Reply · View Tweet · Show ConversationHide Conversation

 

jesseluna: @aaswartz @respres is the closest of the 3. Linda and I are about 20-25 miles away.

about 1 hour ago · Reply · View Tweet · Show ConversationHide Conversation

 

• QueenofSpain: @ResPres yeah, um…..not liking the direction this puppy is moving

• amarquart: @Karoli so winds 2 not helping keep contained? worried 4 u & @queenofspain… no relief insight (weather)?
  about 1 hour ago · Reply · View Tweet

  

• meresgreen: @QueenofSpain can you get out?
  about 1 hour ago · Reply · View Tweet · Show ConversationHide Conversation

  

• QueenofSpain: @tsalagi1 we’re ok. We’re not in any immediate danger. Fire is a good distance. Worse for my son to be in this smoke.
  about 1 hour ago · Reply · View Tweet · Show ConversationHide Conversation

  

• QueenofSpain: I-5 between 405 and the 126 is now shut. SO yeah, that’s us. Don’t come visit
  about 1 hour ago · Reply · View Tweet
   

I’m truly amazed at feedback I’ve received in response to my post on Proposition 8: Why Should the Majority Get to Choose How the Minority Lives?. In addition to the 16 comments on the blogpost itself, I’ve received emails, phone calls, twitter tweets & direct messages, facebook messages, phonecalls and people walking up to me to chat. It’s been so enlightening. Below are some demographics about the folks that have reached out to me:

• 90% of the group voted no for Prop 8.
• Most of them have someone in their family that is gay and therefore directly affected by the law.
• Most were frustrated that a Utah constituency directly contributed money to the passing of a California law.
• A small % felt that the church should decide who was “married”.
• Many mentioned their concern that our children would be taught to hate minorities as a result of this law passage.
• Some didn’t have any direct ties to anyone Gay but were a minority and related to minority causes. Thus, wanted freedom for all.
• Everyone wants to know if I think there’s anything they can still do now to make a difference.

As for me, I’m disappointed that I didn’t write my post a month earlier and that I didn’t do more to influence the defeat of this proposition. Why? Because I think the public was miseducated, scared and that it passed for all the wrong reasons.

I am a straight, married, white female. So, why am I so impassioned about this topic? I want my daughter to grow up understanding equality and love for all…not hate and I feel that discrimination teaches hate. I grew up in a small town where very few black families lived. My grandparents had very racist views that just never sat well with me. I wish that bias could be erased for my daughter’s children. Additionally, focusing our energy on topics like this takes our focus away from solving what I see as more important topics like promoting flexible work for all of you.

There are things you can still do if you’re interested in being a Proponent of No on Proposition 8.

1. See this great blog at After Ellen which contains some great celebrity pictures and stories.
2. This Saturday is National Protest Day. Check out JointheImpact.com for more information about how you can participate in this national event.
3. Join the When/If Prop 8 Passes, We’ll Do Something About It Facebook group.

Lastly, I think this video says everything there is to know about this topic. Please take the short 4 minutes it takes to watch it.

Refuse to Hate from Refuse to Hate on Vimeo.