Archive for the Work Life Balance

Today, I had the great pleasure of a triathlon day made up of hiking, kayaking and waterskiing in a beautiful fall weather day. If you’ve been following along, you know I’m vacationing in the Adirondacks of New York. It was less than 40 degrees fahrenheit when I woke up today so the fact that it turned into such a great day was a true gift. During my kayaking adventure, I was paddling far ahead of my family enjoying the solitude and taking in the beauty of nature. I wasn’t thinking about work or much of anything at all. (This is unusual for me as I am gifted and tortured with a busy mind). This quiet time wasn’t destined to last and was interupted as I hear my husband talking to my daughter, “Great kayaking is all about great balance”, he says to her. I think, “Isn’t that the truth about everything?”. And it is, isn’t it? The key to almost any great challenge we face in life is moderation and balance. As working mothers, we’re probably the worst offenders to turning our heads to balance for ourselves. However, we must remember that everyone around us is tied to our balance. If we’re off kilter, we cause a domino effect for everyone else. Try to remember that. As a Six Figure Mom, likely a Type A personality, you are very powerful. If you don’t take care of yourself and protect your center, you can cause great waves of anxiety and unhappiness all around you. How great that you are so powerful but what responsibility that comes with. If you think this isn’t true, you’re kidding yourself.

Harvard Business Publications Blogs always have something great to read. I can’t do much more justice in describing this article other than to say to you, working moms, READ IT. The article eloquently delivers a discussion of the differences that still exist for working mothers in today’s modern world regardless of how much progress we’ve made since the days of the first feminist. Bottom line is, issues that would never be discussed if Sarah Palin was a male surface for her everyday of her political career. Whether you are a fan or not of this woman, as another mother, you have to empathize with the fact that she must fight this noise everyday spending her energy on it instead the real issues facing our world.

Have you ever seriously thought about what you would do with your life if you won the lottery? If your answer is no, then I must ask you, WHY NOT? My prescription for you is to devote some quality time to this question and write a press release about yourself as if you won enough money to live the life of your dreams. I know some of you naysayers are shaking your heads and saying, “Why would I ever waste time working on something I know is unachievable? I’ll do that if and when I actually win”. Well, with that kind of attitude. It likely IS unachievable. But, if you can change you paradigm a bit and work with me here a little, we can have a little fun and develop a plan. Your mission is to visualize your dream life and then work backwords. You just might get closer than you think to your dream life. For example, my highlevel dream if financial resources were unconstrained consists of the following:

Because there is hurricane remains blowing into upstate New York where I’m vacationing, there is a constant breeze.  It’s a fabulously beautiful morning.  I got straight out of bed and went outside and went for a walk around my mother-in-law’s property.  (Even before coffee…I must be delirious).  She lives on top of a hill so you can see green, rolling hillsides everywhere you look.  It’s like looking at a 360 degree postcard.  Again, the trees are there whispering with their branches.  Just walking around this property is better than being at the Four Seasons Spa.  You just don’t get this stuff in the city.  But maybe that’s just me because I’m a small town girl who grew up in southern Ohio.  I don’t think so though.  As an executive coach, I see so many of my clients in overwhelm because they just can’t seem to make themselves take a break and slow down a bit.  If they could, they’d be better off.  In fact, if I could bring them here, to my mother-in-law’s house, they likely wouldn’t need me anymore (hmmm…reengineering myself out of a job again…I have a reputation for that.  Here we go again.).  But I digress.  There is so much research on the link between taking a break and improved creativity and the things that have been invented, created, written, all kinds of greatness due to sabbaticals, career changes, vacations that I’m always amazed at how many people don’t take advantage of them.  If you are feeling stuck, then you must think seriously about this.  The power of the personal reboot is magnificent.  I think I’ve recommended this book before but it’s so good I’m going to mention it again.  It’s older but still worth a look.  Check out Six Months Off:  The Sabbatical Book for some ideas about a Reboot.  Just read it ok?  There’s no harm in reading.  It might even spark your creativity about how you can affect a reboot while still working.

Some of you readers might remember from my Staycation post that I’m not a fan of staying home for summer vacation, so now I’ve embarked on quite the opposite, an 18 day marathon trip.  I’ll do my best to bring you along if you’re interested.  My posts will likely be more personal in nature over the next three weeks so that’s what you’re in for if you’re planning to play along.

I received great comments both online and in person regarding my previous post, “Is It Easier to Solve The Quadratic Equation or Work LIfe Balance?“so I thought it worthy of further discussion.  Specifically, Jen Potter posted an interesting comment.  We’ll investigate further but first let me tell you a little about Jen and how I know her.  I ran into Jen last weekend.  We probably hadn’t seen each other in over four years.  We used to work together in a large accounting department.  Jen is one of those people that sparkles.  She has an incredible personal compass, pizazz and a personal style that gets her noticed and liked wherever she goes.  She’s also been dealing with life threatening health issues since childhood but she doesn’t let that get in her way.  To the contrary, she uses it as motivation to be strong and live her life cherishing each moment.  When I ran into Jen last weekend she introduced me to her daughter and we talked about her current situation as a part time worker.  She said she told her employer she had to have part time work or resign.  That was the only option she could accept so now she’s working part time.  Jen is an accounts payable employee and she’s out there bellying up to the bar and making change for future generations.  She’s a pioneer in creating her best life and forging a path for flexible work because she’s asking for what she needs and designing a life outside of the box for herself and her family.   What an example for the rest of us?

As for me, I think I’ll take the quadratic equation any day. Not that I love algebra but at least I know it’s solvable. I’m not sure work life balance is. Perhaps it seemingly is one day and then the next day something goes haywire. Did you ever see that pinball machine called Haywire? If you hit a certain bumper, everything goes crazy? That’s what my life feels like when I’m living the facade of work life balance and then one little thing gets tipped. For example, my daughter gets a virus and I have to cancel all of my appointments, then she gives it to me, and I cancel more appointments. You know the drill. Everything goes haywire.

How many of you have discovered my friend the BOSU?  It’s by far my favorite piece of work out equipment of all time and that’s saying a lot since I was very close friends with the reebok step for years.  I love the BOSU at home, at the gym, for short or long work outs, for legs or for upper body.  Okay, I just love it.  You get the point.  I’m pretty skilled with the BOSU for my fitness level but some days I just can’t do anything with it.  Those are the days when I just can’t calm down my mind.  Balancing on a BOSU ball takes incredible concentration and that’s something I just can’t do when my to do list has escalated to the Nth degree.  There are days when I can stand on the BOSU and lift cable weights heavier than what I can standing flatfooted and then there are the days when I can’t even stand on it and balance with any weight.  What’s the difference?  Me.  It’s all in my head.  So, why is this showing up here?  The BOSU exercise and Work Life Balance are the same.  We can’t focus on balance unless we’re focusing on balance so I ask you, what are the processes you have in place to make sure you are making life balance a priority?  Perhaps you should buy a BOSU for home too because, believe me, just looking at it reminds me to get out of my head.

Women consistently tell me, “I love your blog, but I just don’t think I fit as a Six Figure Mom”.  They tell me they aren’t working right now or they don’t make six figure salaries.  Ladies, regardless, YOU are the target.  You and all other moms that have worked, want to work, or are working now.  The thing you all have in common is that a professional career is ingrained in who you are… whether you work today, yesterday or tomorrow. 

This summer,  the ubiquitous “staycation” is all the rage.  Staycationing is choosing to stay at home and enjoy your local community versus traveling for vacation.  I’m all for saving money and for touring my hometown, the fine city of San Diego.  However, I’m not sure I could actually stop working long enough to enjoy the time off.  I know, I know, this is a matter of self-discipline but let’s be realistic.  LIke other working mothers, I’ve got more to do than I have time.  But that’s not my primary concern.  Reduction in creativity and the overall reboot factor is.  It’s been proven repeatedly that some of the greatest inventions, life makeovers and second chance success results when people take a pause.  Type A personality folks like you aren’t really well equipped to do this at all; but especially not in the confines of your own surroundings.  It’s just too distracting.  Here’s what Frommer’s has to say about the staycation.  I have to say I agree with them.  So, if you have to stay in town this season because your budget is too tight, at least spring for a few nights away from home at the best hotel you can afford and have mimosas for breakfast .  (I’ve stayed in a 5 star hotel in downtown Atlanta using Priceline for $85.  Who can pass that up?).  You can also get creative by using those frequent flyer points you’ve been saving for a rainy day or stay with friends as recommended by The Huffington Post (they coined it the Moochcation).  Bottom line, get out of your routine.  Afterall, isn’t that what vacations are all about?  By the way, if you want just the opposite of a staycation and you are planning to travel, the picture above is of Whithaven Beach in The Whitsunday Islands of Australia.  It’s in my top five list of the most beautiful places I’ve ever seen.  If you go there, make sure to hike in, there’s nothing like hiking under huge bats and then the surprise when you crest the mountain and see this beach.  Truly breathtaking.  The other reason I mention this?  You staycationers might need it for your imagination!  Have any great staycation examples?  Leave a comment!